Ten Minutes For ME

I'm on the clock.
I've given myself permission to take 10 minutes out of it all, to just write, because it makes me feel better.

2:24pm... GO

I feel like my life has been a little out of control lately - and I'm not sad, or depressed, or confused (well, maybe a little but that just means I don't have it all figured out!), it's just been chaos in my life and in my head lately. I feel cluttered all within myself.

(*Phone is ringing... SEE WHAT I MEAN! NO, this is MY ten minutes!)

My life is good and I will NOT complain!!! I LOVE being a mom. It's the monst incredible experience of joy and satisfaction that I could never have dreamed up. And quite honestly, I thrive in the chaos that has become my life since becoming a mom. To give you a little perpectice: at one point we had 3 kids 3 years old and under. So no one could fully feed themselves, dress themselves (well, I guess Larissa could do that), go to the potty themselves (start to finish always, if you know what I mean), read to themselves, dress their dolls themselves, play outside by themselves, see what I mean? So yeah, it's busy.

So while just aiming to complete the daily tasks of feeding, clothing and taking care of personal hygiene (not always myself!) then there's the teaching about life, answering the questions, training and work of the heart, discipline, you know: how to help shape your kids to be not just good people, but people of morals and values, beliefs, security, purpose, passion...

And then there's what sometimes feels like a million other hats to wear: wife (first and foremost!), daughter, friend, friend, friend, friend (friends are important), sister, church-person, gym-person, neighbor... the list goes on.

And I'm constantly trying to work out my faith, understand what life is all about, where I'm going and where our family is going. Are we hearing from God? Are we listening? Are we right where we need to be if He's not moving us?

I'm just doing my best. But right now, in this minute, I'm so very tired. I'm happy, but I'm tired. My spirit feels tired. My mind feels tired from just thinking all the thoughts I think, and my body is oh so tired. Blogging helps me declutter myself and clear the space in my head. But I haven't even had time to finish the entries I start! (One day, soon hopefully, I'll just post like 6 at one time!)

I'm ready for a season of a little less business.

Come season of revival and rest and peace! Slow down life. Prioritize Paula, prioritize!

2:35pm - pretty good.